Damn-it Do The Work

I woke up this morning really early with a tight chest and heavy burdens on my mind. I have not been able to get back to sleep. It is the same stuff that I was feeling anxiety over in my last post and I figured out what I needed to do. Now is the tine to do it!!!! I have to stop wallowing in this space. It is not helping the situation and I am getting better quicker than I am actually acknowledging. This tendency to dwell is something that I really need to be more vigilant about overcoming. Nothing in my life is really that bad off, I am just allowing myself to spiral into my own mental and emotional hell cause I feel I have nothing better to do. Somehow the only way to be useful is outside of the home but apparently I am going to be useful to myself and give myself some breathing room. Allow this hiatus to run its course. Calmly accept stillness. Stillness is not being useless.

Time to start doing....
1) Pray and Meditate for calm and guidance
- Choose a prayer. Use the meditation cd.
- Practice the virtue Trust
2) Focus on the chakras where these pains are centered and change the energy.
- Start reading the sections and doing the body scan.
3) It isn't easy to let someone take care of me because I think I owe them something and they may think I owe them something too.
- Time to resolve this. I am married, not single.
4) When I am not creating, I am not happy and I feel less energized and useful.
- Start creating. I keep stopping myself. Need to release energy. "Artists Way?"
5) Breathe...
- Use the meditation to remind me to breathe. Be more aware of when I am holding my breath.