How to be Romantic?

Okay, being romantic is intentional, I think.

I mean I think about what I want to do or say and then I plan it. I can't plan the reaction but I can make plans with the other person in mind. Being romantic, truly romantic, requires an infusion of emotion along the way. An openness and an awareness of the other person even when they are absent.

Romance does not always have to end in sex and I think this is one of the vast wrongs that society has taught about relationships. Usually in dating relationships the purpose of romance is to get folks in bed. I do not mean to generalize but let's be real, this is the pervasive view of the purpose of romance. As I am writing I am coming to realize that because I connected romance with sex and was never in a relationship where sex was appropriate until now, I avoided being romantic.

As I said before, romance is intentional. For that period of time I am not thinking of myself or my happiness. Being romantic is uncomfortable for me. Having someone give me attention when they are romantic is uncomfortable for me. Someone who actually thinks about what I like and then creates the opportunity for us to experience it together, is unfamiliar to me. The only way I can overcome this is to learn to be romantic myself. Watch my husband more carefully and pay attention to what makes him happy. Communicate what I like so that my husband can also be intentional.

Just like the hard, dark parts of a relationship need attention, so do the fun, light parts of that relationship. It is all a part of the adventure of life.

So I am now on a crusade for romance in my life!!! Here WE GO!!